Knowing when to walk away from an argument

A while ago I saw an article on Facebook which reported that Fr. Bourgeois, a priest who for many years publicly opposed the Catholic teaching of a male-only priesthood, had been dismissed from the Maryknoll Fathers and Brothers.

A friend of mine posted a link on Facebook to the article with the comment “Those bastards in the vatican!!!!”.

My friend has links to the Catholic Church and we have Catholic friends in common, but when I saw the article on his Facebook Timeline I noticed that not a single person had offered a defense of the Church’s actions.

The Defense

I decide to give a brief response:

What is ridiculous about dismissing a Catholic priest who has consistently taught contrary to the Catholic faith and who has repeatedly disobeyed the bishops? This hasn’t exactly been a snap decision either – this has been going on for a long time.

He seems like a nice guy, but you just can’t consistently and publicly reject Church teaching and remain a Catholic priest.

…and one hour later another of his friends chimed in:

I agree with David. Lawyers get disbarred when they break the rules of their profession; doctors lose their licenses when they break the rules of their profession. What makes a priest entitled to be a priest when he breaks the rules of his profession? By all accounts the Vatican and other officials have been incredibly patient with his steadfast disobedience up until this point.

Up until this, only one other person had responded to my friend’s posting, which simply said “ridiculous”. However, after our two comments she posted again saying that we had “fair points!”. I was interested to see if my friend would respond to our argument at all…

The Reply

When my friend finally responded, here’s what he wrote:

God = Justice, Vatican = Injustice

How do you respond to that? Well, I did try and coax a more substantial response out of him say “Would you mind explaining that a little more? I don’t follow”, but it was to no avail. He would not be drawn. It is now many months later and I have received no further reply.

Lessons Learned

My reasons for writing about this exchange are two-fold:

1. Firstly, sometime you just need to speak up. One of the commentators went from thinking that it was “ridiculous” to thinking that there we had “fair points!”…and that was without any complicated argumentation. Had we remained silent this person may have never heard even the simplest of counter arguments.

2. Secondly, sometimes you just have to give up. No amount of argument, no amount of reason will shift someone from their position if they are not open to dialog. Until they are ready, you just have to walk away, wait and pray.

How do you handle your exchanges on Facebook?

The article Knowing When To Walk Away From An Argument first appeared on RestlessPilgrim.net