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Catholic Dating: Occam’s Razor

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Since beginning this series a couple of weeks ago, I have received a lot of positive feedback. This has come almost exclusively from the ladies. Well, let’s see how long that lasts… 😉

So far in my response to the question “Why doesn’t that nice Catholic boy ask me out?”, I have omitted a rather obvious possible answer: he doesn’t want to.

Occam’s Razor states, broadly speaking, that the simplest explanation is usually the correct one. So, if a gentleman doesn’t ask out a lady, the simplest explanation is that he’s not sufficiently motivated to do so. It’s tough, I know, but it’s a legitimate explanation.

On the whole, when someone wants something, he seeks it out. If he doesn’t, then the chances are that he doesn’t really want it enough. So, in general, if a guy really wants to ask a girl out, he will. If he doesn’t, then he won’t.

Friendship to Romance?

Why am I saying this and running the risk of offending my female readers?

I’m bringing this up because in the past when I’ve heard the fairer sex complain about a guy’s lack of romantic advances, I’ve sometimes felt that they were willing to accept any explanation other than the simplest answer. These lamentations have sometimes turned into complicated defenses for a guy’s apparent lack of romantic attention. Could it just be that he didn’t want to be more than a platonic friend?

He's Just Not That Into You

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Catholic Dating: True love waits…and waits…

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In this series I’m trying to examine some of the issues and problems within the Catholic dating world. However, before I get underway with today’s post I would like very briefly to reply to an important question which was raised in response to an earlier post. The question was asked, is there actually even a problem here to address?!

I would suggest that we do indeed have a problem. In addition to anecdotal evidence, there is statistical data to demonstrate that there are fewer and fewer marriages taking place today, even among practising Catholics:

Marriage-trends

This decline has far reaching consequences, both for Catholic schools and parishes, as well as for Catholic culture and the Church’s witness to the world. If you would like to read about this further then I would recommend this article by Msgr. Pope.

Choice and Commitment

So with that issue addressed, let’s return to the main question of this series: why aren’t more Catholic guys asking girls out on dates? One possible answer might be because many guys are in no hurry to settle down.

Society today praises choice. With regards to commitment, we are urged to be cautious: “Don’t commit yourself!”, “Someone better might be just around the corner!”, “Leave yourself an escape!”. I would suggest that, because of this, some guys refrain from dating in a misguided attempt to keep their options open (there is a related dynamic here on the part of the ladies, but I plan to deal with that in a later post).

To make matters worse, do we sometimes hear a message from the Church that can sound somewhat similar? In the Catholic Church, marriage is a Sacrament, something serious, important, binding and lifelong. We are therefore often urged to move with great caution. Additionally, with broken marriages all around us, isn’t it sensible to be extremely careful in selecting a future spouse?

I think there is good sense in caution, but have we gone too far? Are we encouraged to wait too long?

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New Testament Warm-Ups: Answers 43-52

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Here are the final answers to the New Testament Warm-Up questions:

43. What appears after Hebrews? What category of books do we call these?
The Catholic Epistles (7 books): James, Peter (x2), John (x3) and Jude . These are letters written by Church leaders other than the Apostle Paul.

44. Who most likely wrote James’ epistle?
James of Jerusalem (“James the Just”). He was Jesus’ kinsman (see Mark 6:3), resurrection witness (see 1 Corinthians 15:7) and “pillar of the church” (see Galatians 2:9). Tradition tells us that he was Bishop of Jerusalem and Martyred in AD 62 (Stoned, clubbed or thrown from the Temple)

45. How would you summarize James’ epistle?
Faith without works is dead. This motif appears throughout. James speaks about practical Christian living and the life of faith.

46. What documents appear next?
1 & 2 Peter

47. What documents appear after that?
1, 2, & 3 John

48. After that?
Jude

49. What is the final book of the Bible?
The Book of Revelation

50. What is its literary genre?
It is an Apocalyptic Book

51. What are the two main senses of Scripture according to the Catechism?
Literal and Spiritual

52. What are the three types of spiritual senses?
Allegorical, moral and anagogical

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New Testament Warm-Ups: Answers 28-42

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Continuing the answers to the New Testament Warm-Up questions…

28. What appears after Thessalonians?
The four letters from St. Paul to individuals: Timothy (x2), Titus and Philemon. The first three of these (and sometimes all four) are commonly known as the “Pastoral Epistles”.

29. Who was Timothy?
Timothy was a constant companion of Paul, recruited during Paul’s 2nd missionary journey (Acts 16:1-3). He also traveled with Paul on the subsequent 3rd missionary journey.

30. What background information do you know about Timothy?
He was from Asia Minor with a Christian Jewish mother (“Eunice”) and a Greek (probably Pagan) father (2 Timothy 1:5; 3:15). Timothy was the co-sender of six of Paul’s letters (2nd Corinthians, Philippians, Colossians, 1st and 2nd Thessalonians, as well as this letter). Tradition asserts that Timothy was the first bishop of Ephesus and was martyred there as an old man.

31. Who was Titus?
Titus was a companion of Paul. He was a Gentile Christian who traveled with Paul and Barnabas from Antioch to Jerusalem and with Paul on his 3rd missionary journey.

32. Who was Philemon?
Philemon was man of Paul’s acquaintance. Paul was possibly instrumental in his conversion to the Faith (Philemon 1:19) and Philemon was possibly involved in some ministerial capacity (Philemon 1:2).

33. Where did Philemon most likely live?
The letter doesn’t indicate the exact location of Philemon and his family, but it is assumed that they were residents of Colossae or a neighbouring city in Asia Minor (modern Turkey). This assumption is based upon the common belief that the slave mentioned in this letter, Onesimus, is the same man delivering the Letter to the Colossians (Colossians 4:7-9).

34. What is the context of the letter?
Paul is sending back to Philemon his slave Onesimus. Additionally, Paul thinks that his captivity will soon be at an end, so he tells Philemon to prepare for his arrival (Philemon 1:22).

35. What was the name of Philemon’s slave?
Onesimus

36. What is the meaning of the slave’s name?
His name means “Useful” or “Benefit”. St. Paul makes a couple of puns on his name in the letter.

37. What does Paul ask of Philemon?
Paul requests that Philemon to forgive his runaway slave Onesimus (Philemon 1:9,17)

38. What book appears after Philemon?
The book of Hebrews.

39. Why does Hebrews appear here?
It appears at the end of the collection of Paul’s work (the “Pauline Corpus”) because of the dispute in the Early Church as to whether or not Paul was its author. Additionally, one would not really call it an epistle.

40. What literary genre is Hebrews?
It is a sermon.

41. What is the main theme of the book?
It explains Jesus in terms of the Old Covenant priesthood and sacrificial system.

42. What did St. Thomas Aquinas think about the authorship of this epistle?
“Catholic tradition holds that Luke redacted the final version of the anonymous epistle to the Hebrews on Paul’s behalf, a view endorsed by none other than Saint Thomas Aquinas.” – Source

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The article New Testament Warm-Ups: Answers 27-42 first appeared on RestlessPilgrim.net

New Testament Warm-Ups: Answers 17-27

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Bible Question Mark

Earlier today I started posting the answers to the New Testament Warm-Up questions. Here is the next set of answers…

17. What books appear in the Bible after Acts of the Apostles?
The 9 epistles sent by St. Paul to different Christian communities.

18. How are these epistles arranged?
They are arranged roughly in order of length, from the longest to the shortest.

19. What are the names of the cities/communities to which Paul writes?
Romans (City of Rome)
1 & 2 Corinthians (City of Corinth)
Galatians (The region of Galatia)
Ephesians (City of Ephesus)
Philippians (City of Philippi)
Colossians (City of Colossae)
1 & 2 Thessalonians (City of Thessalonica)

20. From where did Paul write the epistle to the Philippians?
He wrote it from prison (or while under house arrest).

21. What city was he in most likely at the time?
Rome.

22. Why did Paul write his letter to the Philippians?
Paul’s primary purpose in writing this letter was to thank the Philippians for the “gift” they sent him (probably money), which they sent to him upon hearing of his incarceration.

23. Who probably delivered this letter for Paul?
A man by the name of “Epaphroditus”. This man was the emissary from the Philippian congregation. He was quite sick and near death during his time with Paul.

24. What are the main themes of the letter to the Philippians?
Joy, regardless of the circumstances, through Jesus Christ.

25. What Christian hymn does Paul quote in the letter in Chapter 2?
He quotes the song known as “The Carmen Christi” (Latin for “hymn of Christ”): “Though he was in the form of God…”

26. What is the main theme behind the letters to the Thessalonians?
Christ’s Second Coming.

27. What claim-to-fame do the Thessalonian letter have?
It was most likely the first piece of the New Testament to ever be written.

I’ll post some more answers tomorrow. Happy Lord’s Day!

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The article New Testament Warm-Ups: Answers 17-27 first appeared on RestlessPilgrim.net

New Testament Warm-Ups: Answers 1-16

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A while ago I enumerated all the warm-up questions asked each week at the beginning of our Bible study group. Several people sent me messages asking me for the answers, but one reader, Alexandra, went ahead and sent me her own responses!

So, in case you were curious, over the next couple of days I’m going to be posting the answers to the questions, based upon Alexandra’s email…

1. In what language was the New Testament written?
(Koine) Greek

2. What is the likely exception to this?
The Gospel According to Mathew. The Early Church Fathers say that it was originally written in Aramaic and soon translated into Greek.

3. Which books appear first in the New Testament?
The four Gospels.

4. Why are these books placed first in the canon?
These books appear at the beginning of the New Testament because they contain the teaching, life, death and resurrection of the Lord Jesus and therefore hold pride of place in the New Testament.

5. Why do they appear in this order?
They are arranged in the order of composition as believed by Early Church Fathers.

6. Which Gospels are attributed to Apostles?
Matthew and John

7. With whom is Mark associated?
He was companion of Paul and later Peter. It is said that Mark’s Gospel is the preaching of Peter in Rome.

8. What is Mark’s other name?
Mark is also called John (Acts 12:12). We was the cause of some friction between Paul and Barnabas.

9. With whom is Luke associated?
He was a companion of Paul.

10. What is Luke’s profession?
Physician

11. What comes after the Gospels?
Acts of the Apostles

12. By whom is it written?
Luke, the author of the Gospel which bears his name.

13. To what genre does it belong?
“Acts” is a genre of books in the ancient world that described people’s great deeds. This book describes the history of the Early Church.

14. What is the first main message of the Acts of the Apostles?
The Church continues the mission of Jesus.

15. What is the second main point of the Acts of the Apostles?
The unity of the mission of Paul and Peter. There are numerous parallels between the acts and deeds of these two apostles.

16. Between what years do the events described in Acts of the Apostles take place?
Probably between about AD 30 and AD 60

I’ll post the next set of answers after lunch…

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The article New Testament Warm-Ups: Answers 1-16 first appeared on RestlessPilrim.net

Catholic Dating: Friends First

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Continuing our discussion concerning the Christian dating scene, today I would like to talk about “Friends First” dating. I would like to ruminate over some of the advantages of this approach, but I would also like to discuss some of the potential pitfalls, at least as I see them.

In Christian formation and catechesis, you often hear praise of romantic relationships which were first based on friendship, before the addition of a romantic component. This is what is known as “Friends First” dating.

FriendsThe approach certainly has much to commend itself. After all, it makes sense to get to know someone, that person’s character, personality, interests etc., prior to the big rush of hormones and emotions that come with dating. The “high” that comes from being in a relationship can leave one blind to the warning signs. It’s not hard to find examples of what happens when someone rushes headlong into dating and becomes so emotionally entangled with the other person that it becomes extremely difficult to deal with problems in the relationship, or even to recognize when problems exist.

I know plenty of people who have got together through physical attraction and initial chemistry, only to find out a month or two down the line that there isn’t really anything else on which to base the relationship. To their shock, they realize that the other person is not the person they thought at all! After all, it’s not too hard to “hide the crazy” for the first few months… 😉

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