Friday Frivolity: Catholic Simpsons

The relationship between “The Simpsons” and religion has always been a rather interesting one.  There was a bit of a hoopla in the press and blogsophere recently when an article in the Vatican newsletter, L’Osservatore Romano, had the headline “Homer and Bart are Catholics”.  It was a silly piece which caused, in my opinion, a lot of fuss about nothing.

Having said that, the article was in reference to an analysis done by a certain Fr. Francesco Occhetta which concerned one of my favourite Simpsons episodes: “The Father, the Son, and the Holy Guest Star”, where Homer and Bart come into contact with the Catholic Church.  So, for this week’s “Friday Fivolity”, here are some of my favourite quotations from that episode…

Marge: “All of that standing, sitting and kneeling…It’s like ‘Simon Says’ without a winner!”

Marge:“Catholics can be a peculiar bunch. No birth control, no meat on Friday…”

Homer:“No MEAT?! What do they eat, light bulbs?!”

Homer:“Face it, Marge. Catholics rule! We got Boston, South America, the good part of Ireland, and we’re makin’ serious inroads in Mozambique, baby!”

Marge:“Homer, you’ve been gone all night—and you look like you accepted someone as your personal something. Were you at that Catholic Church?”
Homer:“Look, I know I was supposed to yell at that priest, but he’s so cool! He plays drums in a band with a bunch of other priests!”
Marge:“I knew they’d try to convert you! That’s what they do! Well, I’m not having another twelve kids.”
Homer:“Marge, no one’s saying twelve. Nine, ten, tops!” (Gets out a pamphlet entitled ‘Plop ’til You Drop’)

Bart:“This is a Catholic church. Chicks got no authority here”

Bart:“Don’t you get it? It’s all Christianity, people! The little, stupid differences are nothing next to the big stupid similarities!”

Homer: (after finishing confession) “Woo-hoo, I’m clean! In your face, Lord!
Fr. Sean:“Not yet, Mr. Simpson. I can only absolve you if you’re a Catholic”
Homer:“Uh-huh. And how do I join? Do I whale on some Unitarians?”
Fr. Sean:“Well, it’s a little harder than that. It starts with looking deep inside yourself…” (Homer groans) “But it ends with bread and wine”
Homer:“Woo-hoo!”

 

A slight “oopsie” when they had Ned, an Evangelical, praying before the statue of a Saint…

I hope you enjoy.  Now, since it’s Friday, I’m off to go and eat some light bulbs… [wave]

UPDATE 01-Feb-2021:

Beginning Ignatius’ letter to Polycarp

Well, we’re finally here!  The last letter of St. Ignatius of Antioch!  I’m posting this a bit earlier than usual because the next couple of weeks are going to be rather busy.

Each of the Ignatius’ letters are special for different reasons, but his letter to Polycarp, the bishop of Smyrna, holds a special place in my heart.

In some ways it reminds me of the book of Proverbs, since Ignatius often offers Polycarp advice in the form of short exhortations.

This is the only personal letter Ignatius wrote to a fellow bishop and should, in my not so humble opinion, be required reading for all pastors and all those who minister in the Church.

When I have friends who enter the seminary, they usually receive a card from me with a quotation which comes from somewhere in this letter.  Whenever I become discouraged in the ministries in which I serve, this is the document I usually dig out.

“St. Ignatius of Antioch’s letter to Polycarp” PDF
“St. Ignatius of Antioch’s letter to the Polycarp” Audio

I said this was Ignatius’ last letter, but that is not strictly true, for there was one final letter he wrote, to both his “God Jesus Christ” and to the “Catholic Church”. However, this was a letter of a different kind…  Rather than being written in private, this letter was written in an amphitheatre before thousands of jeering Romans.  Rather than using parchment, he used his own flesh and, in place of ink, his own blood.

St. Ignatius, pray for us.

Beginning Ignatius’ letter to the Smyrnaeans

The final two letters of St. Ignatius which we read are both sent to the city of Smyrna.  The first letter is sent to the Church as a whole, the second specifically to their bishop, Polycarp.

This first letter is special for many reasons, but particularly because it contains Ignatius’ clearest declaration of faith about the Eucharist, as well as being the earliest recorded use of the phrase “Catholic Church”. Invented at Nicea?  I don’t think so.

Here is my abridged version of the letter:

“St. Ignatius of Antioch’s letter to the Smyrnaeans” PDF
“St. Ignatius of Antioch’s letter to the Smyrnaeans” Audio

My Confirmation Prayer

The Scripture which will be proclaimed at Mass in the upcoming weeks looks at the subject of prayer.

The other day, whilst surfing the Internet, I came across the prayer which I used during my time of preparation prior to receiving the Sacrament of Confirmation.  To my surprise, I found that there was an “extra bit” that I had not heard before.  Here it is:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time; Enjoying one moment at a time; Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will; That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him forever in the next. Amen.

–Reinhold Niebuhr

I think I need this right now.

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